And just who was the other one, the Twin's twin?
Was he identical?
Was she fraternal---a sister who stood with the women at the foot of the cross?
I know who that twin is.
I am that twin.
A Doppelganger across time and space,
Except I am more like Thomas than any twin could be.
My doubt is all too obvious---
Heart as his heart---
A child of modernity and Missouri
"Show me!" I say.
"Show me ...you, Jesus!"
"Show me...me!"
Show me---make my mind, my heart sure (RIGHT NOW!)
that it is your voice that is leading me
and not just my own.
Show me---that what I call Truth
is your Truth and not merely my own.
Lord, you were patient with brother Thomas.
You are so patient with me...
So careful with the gentle, constant touch
Down the road to perfection.
Not washing your hands of me in my impertinence
Offering chance after chance with I
So miserably fail
at getting over myself.
When I ache with my unwillingness to face the consequences
Of my luxurious living.
When I sink into repulsive self-pity
Romanticizing into warmth the possibility of pain not yet mine
In order to deny the pain already here.
And then... you show me your scars,
And let me touch your woundednesss.
You show me, show me
How to be the woman who
yearns to fall down at your feet
With lavish love flowing from my heart and hands
Crying out, "My Lord, My God."
+Written Second Sunday of Easter 07
3 comments:
Susan,
This is great.... I going to print it. You have a gift my friend. TY for sharing with us.
Beautiful, Susan. Thank you.
What a great perspective I've never considered. I've always thought of myself, as many have, like Thomas. How wonderful to think of myself as Didymus. Thanks.
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