How Beautiful

Today I was priviledged to be present at Ann Rathert's installation service as the new d.s. for the Gateway Regional District. It was a lovely service. For me, I was most moved by a video presentation which simply showed pictures of most of the churches in the district, with Twila Paris' "How Beautiful" playing while the churches were shown. Small churches, new churches, clapboard churches, churches with steeples, brick churches,. All representing communities of faith that will gather tomorrow morning to worship God, to hear the word read and proclaimed, full of people who will be listening for the Word. Yes, God, protect the church, but prod it, too, tomorrow and each Sunday. And protect and prod those pastors, too.

The Clothing of Christ

I wanted to write a poem tonight about the clothing of Christ...and clothing ourselves in love as we are admonished to do in Colossians 3: 14...(I am working on memorizing this section of Colossians...such a beautiful thing)

I wanted to write and say, how Christ clothes us in love with the love of friends, and how much I have been made to feel safe, secure, warmed, protected, adorned, swaddled, hemmed in, loved by that clothing today.

I wanted to, but I simply am too tired or too relaxed and with no poetry coming, I will just whisper to the Tailor, the Seamstress, the Weaver, the Spinner, as Ann Lamott tells us, one of the only true prayers we every need (along with, "please, please, please"), I say "thank you, thank you, thank you."

Postmodern youthministry Event next weekend

United Methodist Friends in the KC area: Do you know about this? Tony Jones is absolutely wonderful, brilliant, a delight, and genuinely committed. He is head guy (staff) for Emergent Village, and I consider him a friend. GO! if you want to learn something about youth ministry and have a good time doing it..


Ministry Resource CenterSeminars
with Tony Jones
Sept. 20-22 , 2007at College Church of the Nazarene
The cost for the 3-day conference is only $50
The Ministry Resource Center at MNU, NTS, Youthfront and NYI are pleased to welcome Tony Jones, author of Postmodern Youth Ministry (Zondervan), for a three-day MRC/NTS conference, Sept. 20-22, 2007.
During several plenary sessions, Tony will offer insights into how the enormous philosophical and cultural shifts of postmodernism affect today’s teenagers. Attendees will greatly benefit from the breakout sessions and panel discussions around what makes for transformative ministry within this changing, postmodern context.
View the Promotional Flier (PDF 111 KB Help ) Detailed schedule information is also available. Plus, you can register online now or print the registration form (PDF 143 KB Help ) and mail or fax it in.
Brought to you in part by:
MNU, Nazarene Youth International, YouthFront, and Nazarene Theological Seminary.
This is a relevant conference you don’t want to miss! **WE HAVE REACHED OUR MAXIMUM CAPACITY for the luncheon for this seminar.
If you would still like to register for the seminar only, you may do so for
$15. Lunch will be on your own.

-->

Charge Conferences #s 4 and 5

I had a charge conference last night and tonight, last night at Napolean, tonight at Dearborn. Both are served by student pastors. Jamie Gehrke just began July 1; Sue Reames started her fourth year, I think, in July, and continues to be very well received at Dearborn. Jamie is in his mid thirties, served in the Marines, has the coolest glasses frames I have seen other than mine and is off to a very good start in Napolean. Sue is, well, a mature woman--her spouse Travis is a retired pastor serving in my district. Sue will graduate in May and hopes to be commissioned next year. The charge conferences went well I think; the last two years I did the very same devotional at almost all my conferences---this year I sort of am. I am less structured this year so far (I have had five) which I think comes not from carelessness but from me being more confident. I am REALLY enjoying these..No big revelations here, but just a positive start to cc season. I shared the 5 practices at Napolean, which they generally did not know about...their lay leader Mike will take the lead in helping them study and find ways to shape their ministry around these. At Dearborn, Sue has preached a sermon series on the practices this summer , and when I had the folks help me name what they are, they had an idea. We talked quite a bit at Dearborn about how to turn outward in ministry--I was able to share some about a model for ministry with public schools. Anyway, hunt as I did, I found no signed print of Picasso's Crucifixion at either Napolean or Dearborn, but at both places, I did find as always fine folks dedicated to the ministry of Jesus Christ through their churches. And nurturing of student pastors. Yea!

A surprise picture

A good weekend thus far. Yesterday's two morning charge conferences went well. The one for the Bogard/Mandeville charge (Bogard has 10 in worship regularly, Mandeville, 5) was at Bogard this year, where I have never been before, I am sorry to say. It is a pretty sad little town. It did at one time have a downtown...every one of the buildings is now dilapidated and I was told they are to be torn down. Bogard UMC used to have lots more folks than they do now, and they know the future isn't very bright for them. After charge conference I went upstairs (after eating not American cheese and Ritz crackers, but ham on white bread and homemade peanut butter cookies) and saw a church that reminded me of a couple of other buildings we have. BUT, what really caught my eye was a piece of art framed on the wall. Yes, there were the pervasive Head of Christ with the wavy hair in profile and maybe even a Last Supper picture, but there was another as well. Salvadore Dali's St. John of the Christ. Numbered in pencil (132 of 175) signed, yes I said signed, in pencil, by Salvadore Dali. I kid you not. I stood there and stared at it for a while. And then went downstairs to ask my questions. Where did it come from? Oh, Richard gave it to us a long time ago. Who's Richard? Oh, he comes sometimes. That is about all I got out of them. I tried to explain that they had quite a treasure up there. I even said, without thinking, that if their financial picture got really bad, they could sell it on ebay (WHAT was I thinking???) then I tried to quickly cover by saying, "but of course, the neat thing is that you have it and I am sure you wouldn't sell it..." The good Bogard folks (5 of them) and the one Mandeville folk (1) didn't seem offended at all, but did look a touch puzzled by my excitement over the print. AH well.

A Prosaic Poem

I am tempted to neaten this up, and edit it a bit but I will leave it as it is. Some real feelings here, so take it for what it's worth...at least, hopefully it's honest:

BELIEVE IT OR NOT...

Sometimes I forget that

I am a WOMAN in ministry...

Something I always remembered 30 years ago,

serving as a student intern

At one of those all-male-ushers-wear-a fake-carnation

churches (which of course is a stereotype...it was a good church)

I was told there, to never wear open toed sandals again

when I served communion at the rail

Someone, who had her head down, praying, had seen

and complained about my painted toenails.

Sometimes now, I forget that I am a WOMAN in ministry...

But then, it happens.

As I sit crocheting hats for the homeless

In a meeting of leaders, mostly male

And I try to hold my tongue

And try to hide the tension in my shoulders

And that my confidence is so low.

And anyway, I know I will be perceived as

too soft if I speak that "l" word again.

"Love" of course.

Love of pastors

Love of churches

Love tomorrow morning as I sit down at my first

fall charge conference

In a musty church basement way out in the country

Five people present

Related by blood and spirit

And I will listen as they tell me how much

they love their lay pastor

And we will eat American cheese and Ritz crackers

And drink ice tea.

And as I leave I will look at the beautiful cemetery

Out back of the church.

And I will think of a mother's tears that watered the earth

And the brave widows

and the husband who ached his way to the grave of his one

true love.

Tomorrow, I will be quiet and listen

As they share their lives with me, those basement folks.

But today, with sadness (and tears later, of course, driving home, where only a friend could

hear by phone)

I had listened as I sat in the meeting and felt unheard (my fault, only, perhaps)

And unable to explain

Sitting among the masculine confidence that can, most of the time,

steady and assure me so.

I sat.

I thought again what it means to be a Mother Sheep.

To be glad to be one.

Could I ever say it out loud in a venue like today

Without being demeaned or belittled (yes, my perspective only)

How to stay proud of my own strength

Without being so confident that I leave no room for others

To help me understand my weakness.

And how to love those guys

Despite my belief that they never will completely understand.

I am a woman and, praise Jesus, I am a mother

And I am a mother sheep.

And grateful for all of that

And grateful to the One who carries mothers

On his shoulders

And whom I hope I one day will hear say to me,

"Well done, my love."

Error on page???

Tomorrow, district committee leadership from around the state meet in Columbia to be trained by the Board of Ordained Ministry of our conference on new procedures and deadlines that the district committees need to know about. Most folks reading this are Umers, and so, have at some time, lamented the long laborious process we call "steps into ordained ministry." I have the distinction of having been candidacy registrar for the BOM for 12 years, and in three conferences (Mo East, Mo West and simply Mo). I trained mentors, answered questions, defended processes and generally was the point person for process questions most of that time. I lived through the 1996 changes, having been registrat for most of 1992-2004. Groan.

Now we here that the ministry study will not be ready for General Conference next year. I confess that I have not taken the time to research why that is...but it can't be for lack of criticism of the process (hey, it's SO goood, let's leave it that way!) As I say in emergent talks, I know and so do you, that we are losing some of our most creative off the wall young leaders, whom we need desperately, to other denominations because they are impatient? Well, yes. Because they don't like our theology? Sometimes. But often than not, because something happens along the complicated way that hinders their process (a report is not filed; a ds doesn't turn in a recommendation; or maybe they mess up and don't show up for an interview and it happens one time too many, and bye-bye creativity. Not to say there aren't some good ones around ( I have plenty in my district) but we need even more. BTW there is no picture on this entry because every time I tried to access the "steps into ordained ministry board" from the GBHEM, I received the message "error on page." Hmmmm.

At 52

When my mother turned 52, she got her drivers license for the first time and returned to school to get her college education. Her baby (me) was 16 and I guess that seemed to be a good time for her to do what she had wanted to do but had never done.

When I turned 52 last December, I was in the midst of recovery from a chemical depression, a district superintendent, in the midst of counseling that was helping muchly, and wondering what my 52nd birthday year would begin. So far this year, I have toyed with (some seriously, some not): going back to school to get my (what was once called) M.L.S.--master of library science; not returning to Kansas City this summer when I went to St Simons with Caleb; selling the SSI condo and buying modern design KC condo; applying for jobs at seminaries in order to work with...well, seminarians; writing a book; losing a lot of weight; getting comfortable with my present weight but getting in better shape; getting a couple new kittens; and well, many other things, too. Some of this toying I have lived out. Some were mere fancies. One that I am living out is: turning my apartment living room into a mid-century, Danish modern marvel. I bought three small chairs with ottoman and built in desks on two at River Market Mall, plus two really cool 50s lamps and two "gravel pictures" (colored stones that I think use to come in a kit like paint by number) and I was inspired by one of my favorite places in the Volker-39th street corridor, Boomerang, at its huge warehouse sale this weekend. There was SO much really good stuff. I went three days in a row (it was only 5 minutes from our place)...I bid on a couch that I didn't get (but I was glad I didn't get it...more on that later), two kitchen bowls, a cool old ash tray that can be used for many other things than ashes (and it has a cross, of sorts, painted on it??? Maybe an Ash Wednesday ash tray...nah...), and bid on and got, for $20, four Samsonite chairs (see picture above) that I am painting four different colors. I spray painted one a buff color tonight and thus the resulting picture. The original is on the left...rusty frame, but gorgeous line. Yesterday I went to Retro Fusion downtown, looking for that ephemeral DML (Danish Modern Loveseat) and I was told that I had a great eye for very good Danish modern. And to think, two months ago, I barely had an eye at all :-) And I found THE LOVESEAT on line last night. Brandy is sending it to me via Greyhound (seems fitting for a 50s loveseat) from St. Petersburg later in the week. Here it is, in its simple loveliness, too:

No, I'm not wild about the paisley either...I plan to re-cover the the cushions in a cranberry-colored fabric. I also have ordered a rug (clearance through Rug Nation....wow, do they have some NICE things and not to pricey) from San Antonio. I think right now the rug is the only thing not "used" that will appear in the living room. Can you tell I am really in to this?

And..on the ds front, what I have done is to go more with my own strengths--especially spiritual formation stuff, and that is how I am leading the pastors this year. This week we had two pastors meetings, one on each side of the district, where I unveiled THE READING LIST (not whole lots of push back, but some, that I am asking all full timers to read four out of seven books this year and come to a book study, too). We are also concentrating on the four "days apart" that will be intentional faith development.

So, I guess, at 52, I am learning the truth. Follow your bliss before it gets any later; get to know the sales guys at Boomerang, in order to not only have somebody help you get your stuff in the car, but just because the blond guy, in particular, is one of the nicest, most helpful guys(and gay as Joseph's coat) I have met in retail in a while; go with your gut in leading your district; and hope that indeed, it IS true that cynicism and loneliness that seems rampant in the United Methodist ministry can be overcome by growing in grace and spirit. And practicing the means of grace. And learn the difference between an Eames and a Le Corbusier. It could yield you much joy.